This week has been rocky. I have felt pretty bad through most of it, but this afternoon for some reason, I began to be filled with hope. Hope for a good future. Hope that my children will be okay—better than okay—for they carry their daddy's love in them. Todd will always be a part of me—we traveled too long together for it to be any other way. But I also know that he would want me to keep on living…and not to act like I have died too. He was too full of life himself. I am sure there are many more rough days ahead, but I am thankful for this surge of hope.
I wrote the above comments yesterday. Today has been okay...no major ups or downs. I like my new job very much, and I am thankful that I had it to go to everyday this week. The woman that I have assisted this week is wonderful, wise and understanding. We had a lot of paperwork to do--many tasks that were tedious and required time but not too much brain power--which was just what I needed this week. The kids did well their first week back at school...but it has been a draining week for them as well. Mom and Katie have been here helping us all get back into a routine. We would never have made it to school and work on time without them. Next week I will have to get lunches and clothes ready the night before so we can all get where we need to go...I know I can do it. I am ready for this.