Friday is Todd's birthday. Luke's is Sunday. We thought Luke would be a birthday gift the year he was born, and he was, kind of--but I guess he decided he wanted his own day to celebrate, so he just sort of hung out for a couple of extra days. Todd never forgot my birthday (or our anniversary, or the kids' birthdays, or his family's birthdays, etc.), but I did forget his one year...I can still remember grading exams when I got a call from a dear friend wanting to wish Todd a "happy birthday." I panicked--my mind raced as I tried to grasp exactly what he was saying on the other end of the phone and I tried to remember what the day's date was. I had prepared NOTHING! Our friend helped me pull together dinner by providing potatoes and some kind of meat he had grilled or smoked that day, and I quickly made a cake so that when Todd arrived home from work he was unaware I had totally forgotten...until I narked on myself...I've never been one to be able to hide stuff like that--I always feel a need to confess. We laughed about it, and I never forgot again...although last year I did accidentally schedule a girl's trip at the same time as his and Luke's birthdays...I was mortified when I realized what I had done, but Todd just laughed about it and told me to ahead and go on the trip as scheduled. I went on the trip, but I met up with the family in Bowling Green (Corvette Museum) on Luke's actual birthday. Todd was so good natured about things like that...he rarely cared if he was "neglected." He taught me a lot about not taking things personally and rolling with the flow of things (although I have not achieved his level of success in this area).
I have begun to recall even more good things. I finally remember the affectionate names he called me. I remember the smell and feel of his neck when I would bury my face in it , and I remember the softness of his cheek right after he shaved. I remember the look on his face and expression in his eyes when he shared something he was excited about. I also remember how I could shut him down with a word or two that expressed my lack of enthusiasm...that memory I could do without. I guess it's a packaged deal, though, huh?